Welcome to 2012

Posted by Lisa Laree to Beer Lahai Roi

I don't really make New Year's Resolutions.  But Jan 1 is a good time to take stock of what's happening, what shouldn't be happening that is, what should be happening that isn't, and what I can do about either one.

If 2011 was about transition, I think 2012 is going to be about implementation.  The observable changes from 2011 aren't so obvious; but I have some internal things that have changed.  I think there is a 'critical mass' point of, well, disgust with the status quo that must be achieved before any real change takes place.

And I think I spent most of 2011 building up to that critical mass point in a number of areas.

But I need to be strategic in how the changes are implemented or I will overwhelm myself and flop right back down into the comfortable but unproductive mess. Only it won't be comfortable any more and I'll feel even worse.

Now, every January we have a 21 day fast declared at church.  A Fast of Submission, for those of you who weren't here when I did my little study on fasting.  For quite a while...maybe the past 3 months...I've been feeling a call to take this year's fast to another level, because *I* have issues that I need to deal with by focusing on them with prayer and time priority.  The idea of a 40 day seeking fast began to present itself to me.  Not a total abstinence sort of thing, but 40 days of minimal food and media with the purpose of setting priorities on some other things that have been sorely neglected.

I was kicking this around on one of the last staff prayer mornings, wondering if I were just trying to be religious or if I really had the call and grace of God to to that.  Because if it was just my own will power trying to assert itself, I might have a religious exercise but no transformation.  But if this is a God-inspired idea, well, things will change.  But how could I know?

Well, I did the ol' random-verse thing.  And the passage my Bible fell open to was in Ezekiel 4, where Ezekiel is being given instructions about the demonstration of siege that he was to give the people of Israel and Judah.  I began in verse 1 and read along, almost amused at the scenario (THIS is what I need to hear??), plainly thinking that there wasn't anything here for me, when I came to a phrase at the tail end of verse 6 that seemed to jump off the page at me and straight up gave me goosebumps:

 I have assigned you 40 days

So.  40 days it is.

I will have a short list of foods that I will eat; I've discovered that I can't go more than about 2 days on juice and water or I get can't-spell-my-name stupid.  So I will have some low fat protein in the mix.  But only a little.

And I will forgo Internet media and the like except for one thing.

I intend to blog daily on Beer Lahai Roi.

Part of the reason I started BLR was to put a demand on the revelation of God in my life.  And I have been very lax in doing that.  The sewing blog will sit idle for 6 weeks,  but I plan to blog HERE to keep myself accountable and to keep myself  looking and seeking. I need that discipline back in my life.

This is really different than any other fast I've done;  I'm excited about it and intimidated by it at the same time.  BUT...I know God has great reservoirs of grace, and it's that grace that I'm depending upon to get through it.

The church's fast is set to go from  (I think) Jan 15 - Feb 4; I'm going to start about  week early (Jan 9) and go almost two weeks longer (Feb. 18).

It's kind of interesting that the Friday Faithful Faves post at the end of the fast will be Revelation

I debated the value of sharing all this publicly, because a fast really is supposed to be very personal.  But my motive here is not to demonstrate my spirituality...but to just be honest and say I am sick and tired of the same old traps and habits and patterns and I need to break out of them.

Its time to implement some change.

So 'Change Twenty Twelve' is going to be the label for the series...however it turns out....