Stop and Rest

All last week, I tried to get to the computer to post some insights I'd gained during the fast; however, computer time is still at a premium in our corner of The Rocket City, and I just couldn't get it done.

Then, last Friday, I got results of a blood test and found out that I've got an active mononucleosis infection. Well, that DID explain a lot.

So now I'm trying to figure out how to stop everything and rest. I'm not doing so well; I was at work about 4 hours yesterday and 2 1/2 more today.

I have sub teachers for my Wednesday night class for the next couple of weeks; if I can find someone to cover the Sunday morning class I will stay home all weekend...I've already gotten excused from choir for the rest of the month.

At first, I thought...yeah, rest...I can sit at home with my Bible and my notebooks and just spend the day with Jesus! How wonderful!

But I'm falling asleep when I sit still. My plan (did you catch that? "MY PLAN"? ) to use my resting time productively isn't working so well. At least not yet, because I haven't sat down to rest until I've Hit The Wall.

So...all that reflecting I did during the Jubilee year about rest is now going to come home to roost. Until I've rested, I'm not much good for anything. And if I *don't* rest, it's only going to get worse, not better.

This is an exercise in trust...trust that the people to whom I have delegated things will carry them out. That's hard for me; I've been let down seriously many times in the past. But now it's not a trust of the PEOPLE...I've got to trust GOD that He'll work through the people. And I've got to learn to let go of the details that, just maybe, aren't as important as I thought they were.

Friends, I've got to completely drop MY AGENDA.

I thought I had gotten rid of my agenda along time ago. But, guess what, I found out I still have one. It's just not the same one it used to be.

So, I will continue to reflect whilst (hopefully) contemplating the back of my eyelids as much as possible in the next couple of weeks, and, once I've rested enough, post something. ;)