Daddy's Got it Covered

Posted by Lisa Laree to Beer Lahai Roi

I have some really big screw-ups in my life.

Things that I said/did that were just plain stupid.

Things that I said/did that were a product of an overly developed judgment reflex.

Things that I said/did out of spite or retaliation.

Things that I said/did out of the misguided notion that I knew what was best.

Things that I said/did because I was too tired/frazzled/distracted/etc to think my actions through clearly.

And the worst thing about these screw-ups is that they did not only affect me. The things that resulted in humiliation I can deal with.  Humiliation is not fatal.  Yes, I'm still humiliated whenever those lapses in good judgment come to mind, but that just serves as a good reminder that I'm NOT all that and a bag o' chips. But those other things...those affected others.

Whether it was a result of intentional action or not, I hurt other folks.  Or caused someone to be offended with Christ because of my actions.

And, for most of them, there is no going back and offering restitution.  There is no undoing the damage.  Too much time, too much distance...not enough credibility.  Not anymore.  Not since...the screw-up.

We all live with this stuff.  I may feel like I'm the numero uno example of the bull in the china shop syndrome,  but I know that I am not alone.

One day, though, I read a verse that I've heard a bazillion times, and suddenly, unexpectedly, it offered me some comfort.

For we know him who said, 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' and again, 'The Lord will judge his people'.  --  Heb. 10:30 NIV

Nope, not terribly comforting for the offender at first glance, is it?

But...look at His promise...that He will judge, that He will avenge, that He will repay.  As a judge...He is righteous.  He does not judge on appearances, but on the heart.  The times I did wrong from a wrong heart attitude, He knows.  Those times I did wrong from honest mistakes or sheer stupidity, He knows.  And I know I cannot repay the damage that I have done.

But He has promised that if I confess my sins...my errors...towards Him and towards others, He cleanses and He forgives.  And, He repays.

If I am trusting Him to repay me for the damage done to me by others, I have to also trust Him to repay the debts I owe to others for the damage done to their spirits that I cannot repay.

Now, please don't hear me say that I can do whatever I want and He'll take care of it.  No.  That's not what I mean.  But it does mean that I can acknowledge my error, own it as mine with no excuses or blame shifting,  confess to Him that I did wrong, accept His forgiveness and trust Him to  make any necessary restitution on my behalf when I cannot do it on my own.

And, conversely, it obligates me to forgive anyone of those debts I perceive as owed to me, and look to Him for that restitution.  Maybe this is why  He emphasizes forgiveness so...it is intertwined.  Forgiveness cannot be received if it is not passed along.

Recognizing God's forgiveness is really the only way we can live with our past mistakes...I know it's the only way I can live with mine.