Posted by Lisa Laree to Beer Lahai Roi
We are continuing a bit of musing over the question..."What do I do if the church I attend doesn't have any outlet for my creative endeavors?", which was the topic of discussion in my creative community's monthly zoom meetup. The reason for that question boiled down to..."Should I leave and go somewhere else where I can express that creativity?"
In Part 1, I talked about changing churches in general...why does one leave one church and go to another? But in Part 2, I want to talk about the question as it applies to art expression in a local congregation.
All of this is strictly from my own experience and observation, so take it how you may. Not trying to establish doctrine or any such thing. Just points to think about. Because my creative expression in my church has always been one of my...issues that I've had to wrestle with. And I attend a church that is remarkably supportive of artistic expression.
I am going to quote from our church's position on the arts, just for background (and because I think this wording is awesome):
We are committed to honoring God in both our art and our lives. Our identity is found first in Christ, not in our gifts or desires. As artists, we pursue holiness, humility, and excellence, using our creativity to glorify God and serve others.
We believe that through the arts, we are called to proclaim truth, embody goodness and unveil beauty in a broken world; inviting others to encounter the presence of God through what we create. We treat our stages as pulpits, our studios as sanctuaries and our performances as offering.
To God be the glory in every note, every brushstroke, every word, and every movement.
With that kind of intentionality in using the arts as a vital part of ministry, questions of expressing personal creativity shouldn't even be necessary, right?
Well, maybe. What if the church has an abundance of fantastically talented people, and I am a person of just average talent? Maybe I'm not needed? Should I go elsewhere that can use a person of average talent?
Or what if I attend a church that looks slightly askance at the arts? Considers it worldly or inappropriate for the worship of God? Should I go somewhere that will use and appreciate the arts?
If the question in part one is answered...yes, I feel that God has sent me here and no, I don't have a clear word from him that it is time to move, then...how do I reconcile the desire to serve in that area with the frustration that it, for whatever reason, isn't happening?
Those were the questions I wanted to raise...and I struggled with how to put the things I am learning into words.
And my thoughts are still shifting...as in, I know the way I ought to view it, but struggle with the actual implementation.
The first thing is that, as the above statement says, my IDENTITY is not in my artistic expression: it is in Jesus. The other came in the scripture that we used for this week's prayer focus, Phil. 4:8 -
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable -- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-- think about such things.
And here is what I wrote in my journal in response to that verse...in the context of arts and expression...
Waiting on God's timing is one of the most difficult -- and most important -- aspects of following him. But the focus during that waiting time is what will make or break that experience. Focusing on what is NOT happening -- whether it is not being seen/ not being heard or if it's seeing other people have favor in the area in which one is trying to operate -- that is the OPPOSITE of Phil. 4:8.
Focusing on what is good, pure, right, true, lovely, honest, honorable, praiseworthy, etc., doesn't just keep the negative away but is also feeds the soul the very essence of what is needed for an artistic expression -- in whatever form or medium. All of those intangibles are aspects of the character of God, and beholding him is the source for all transcendent inspiration.
It's all for him, anyway, and if he is an audience of one who smiles at the offering, who could say it is not enough?
I can remember a time several years ago when I was on a walk around the neighborhood, and I was in a place of great frustration, feeling that the creative things I did were not good enough to be used in a public setting and kinda mourning that it would all be overlooked and missed and how sad was that?...when I had a mental picture, or maybe even experienced for just a moment, myself as a little child, climbing into the lap of Daddy God and showing him the latest thing I'd created. And he saw it, put his arms around me in a hug and told me how much he loved it and that he was so glad I did it and how proud of me he was for the work I'd put into it.
Even just typing that memory still brings tears. It was so very real at that moment.
Because, when it all boils down, creative expressions are for God, whether or not it gets shared with others. And if it's for him, he knows the best application of it; whether it is an intensely personal response to him or it is something that has the ability to move others to a similar response. Not everyone has a ministry to the crowd in the center of the room; some folks are called to the individuals in the corners. We are the ones who put a different value on those expressions; God does not.
What matters isn't what happens with the art; what matters is my attitude while creating/ expressing it.
I am not here to tell you that I have completely overcome the discouragement that sometimes hits when my creative expression isn't quite lined up with what is needed around me, but I am learning that it belongs to God to do with what he pleases.
So, I guess the conclusion is...if nothing seems to be gaining traction now, but I am where I feel God has placed me, then there is a purpose and a reason for the lack of favor from others, and it becomes a matter of trusting that God doesn't waste anything. And...who knows...there may be a time when the backlog of creativity...be it songs, canvases, scripts, sculptures, etc...has a sudden and unexpected outlet that is nothing I could have imagined. Or maybe a generation or two will pass and some descendant will find a bit of a manuscript that has an impact on his or her life. There's no way to tell how God's plan works from the front end.
But if I make my church experience about me and my gifting, I will miss what he is doing all together. And that would be the greater tragedy.
No comments:
Post a Comment